Merry Christmas, fellow Smoperators! Things have been fairly quite of late, but we'll aim for a more prolific output in the coming year.
Peace, love and opera!
Pirates of Penzance AbridgedPirates of Penzance Abridged by Ajehy
Arrgh, aargh, me hearties. We must search for the black pearl..
Oh, right! Frederick, our apprentice has turned 21 on this warm and sunny day in late February. Let us rejoice and drink pink alcohol.
No pink alcohol for me! For I must leave you.
Why? You're a better pirate than any of us.
I'm not an orphan so I don't fit in. Anyway I'm the Slave of Duty and must therefore kill you all!
That's so sad! I have to cry for the man who is going to kill me. Goodbye! When you kill us make it quick.
Of course! Though there is only one of me and 20 of you, I'll be sure to kill you quickly.
Just make sure to take your girlfriend. PLEASE!
But she's old enough to be my mother!!
Exactly. Bye now!
So - are we leaving?
Sure! Why not. Hey, wait a second...
Daughter and Mabel
(sings) Climbing over rocky mountains..
Oh my god, they're gorgeous! Screw th
The Magic Flute -out of tune-"Dude, there's a snake after me."The Magic Flute -out of tune- by Expatriate
"Man, I'm gettin' tired. Maybe I should call for help."
"Yeah, totally. Help! Help!"
"Nuts, no one ever comes when I call for help. Maybe I'll just faint."
"Yeah. Goodbye world."
"Look at the poor prince, flat on the ground."
"Hey, we're the Three Cool Babes. Let's save his skin."
"I love killing snakes. They do such a nice gurgle when they die."
"Think we should go tell the Queen? She always likes to be up on everything."
"Yeah, good idea. Ciao, princie. Hope he wakes up soon."
"Sing high sing low! I am the bird-creep! Darn it, I just missed the Three Cool Babes. Ooh, what's this prince dude doing here?"
"Ugh…what am I doing here?"
"Dunno, that's what I just asked."
"Who are you?"
"Papageno, the bird-creep. And you be…?"
"Tamino, Mighty Prince So Don't Mess With Me."
"Well I just saved your hide, Mighty Prince So Don't Mess With Me."
"Oh yeah, there was a snake trying to eat me. Ya take care of it?"
"Looking Glass" parody, pt 4Through the (abridged) Looking Glass"Looking Glass" parody, pt 4 by Inverted-Jabberwocky
(and what malice was found there)
Surely you can come up with your own alternate title by now!
It's not like anyone pays any attention to them, anyway.
I mean, how many people go around calling Così fan tutte by its oh wait . . . never mind
Now with 30% more wholegrain fibre.
Alice is curled in a foetal position behind Humpty Dumpty's wall, muttering almost incoherently to herself.
ALICE: It all makes perfect sense now . . . this Looking Glass Land, it's really Silent Hill . . . and Humpty Dumpty was my own personal Pyramid Head . . . no wonder he makes everyone in Tom Waits' Alice look like absolute cream puffs . . . and this wall looks like the one that Laura was sitting on; I shouldn't be surprised if Humpty ate her . . . and now I'll probably run into Eddie . . .
READERS: Include all the inane Silent Hill references you want, it won't disguise the fact t
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